What if feeling disconnected from joy isn't just part of getting older?
What if it's your body trying to tell you something?
That question sits at the heart of my conversation with Dr Jordin Wiggins. While we talked about libido, intimacy and women's health, what unfolded was a much bigger discussion about pleasure, burnout, boundaries and the way many women slowly lose touch with themselves.
Jordin's own journey into this work began through her experiences as both a patient and a healthcare practitioner.
Like many women, she found herself dealing with symptoms that weren't easily explained or addressed. Pelvic pain, bleeding, vaginal cysts, iron deficiency and repeated attempts to find answers eventually revealed something many women know all too well: sometimes the hardest part isn't the symptoms themselves, it's not being heard.
That experience led her to explore a different question.
What if women's health isn't just about managing symptoms?
What if it also includes understanding what helps women feel alive?
One of the most fascinating parts of our conversation centred around what Jordin calls the "pleasure problem."
Many women reach a point where they look around at their lives and think, "Everything should be fine. I have so much to be grateful for."
And yet something feels missing.
The spark.
The excitement.
The sense of enjoyment.
The feeling of being fully present in your own life.
Jordin explained that this experience can sometimes be linked to something called anhedonia, which is the reduced ability to experience pleasure and joy.
While it may sound like a psychological issue, it can show up in very practical ways.
Low libido.
Reduced desire.
Lack of motivation.
Feeling emotionally flat.
Going through the motions without really feeling connected to what you're doing.
What struck me during our conversation was the idea that pleasure isn't something extra we earn once all the important things are done.
It's part of being healthy.
When we're constantly stressed, overwhelmed and operating in survival mode, the nervous system prioritises getting through the day over experiencing joy. The result is that many women become incredibly productive while simultaneously feeling disconnected from themselves.
We also explored why so many traditional self-care practices fail to create lasting change.
It's not because massages, yoga classes or baths don't work.
It's because many women are trying to relax while remaining mentally switched on.
Their bodies never fully receive the signal that it's safe to rest.
That's where pleasure practices can become surprisingly powerful.
Not because they're indulgent, but because they help regulate the nervous system and reconnect us with experiences that feel nourishing, enjoyable and meaningful.
The conversation also touched on something I know many women will recognise: overfunctioning.
Doing for everyone else.
Managing everything.
Holding everything together.
Being the organiser, planner, fixer and emotional support person for everyone around you.
At first glance it can look like competence.
Underneath it often comes at a significant cost.
Energy.
Time.
Identity.
Joy.
Jordin describes overfunctioning as doing for others what they could do for themselves. While it may feel helpful in the moment, it often leaves women exhausted and disconnected from their own needs.
Changing that pattern isn't always comfortable.
Boundaries rarely are.
When you stop carrying everything, other people often notice. Relationships may need to adjust. Old expectations may be challenged.
But creating space for yourself is not selfish.
It's necessary.
Another area we explored was intimacy and the outdated stories many women have inherited about sex.
For generations, sex has often been defined through a very narrow lens, one that doesn't necessarily reflect women's experiences of desire and pleasure.
Jordin encourages women and their partners to become curious, communicate openly and create experiences that prioritise connection, safety and enjoyment rather than simply following a script.
Throughout our conversation, one message kept returning.
A healthy life isn't simply the absence of illness.
It's the presence of vitality.
Connection.
Pleasure.
Joy.
Meaning.
If you've found yourself feeling flat, exhausted, disconnected or simply wondering where the old version of you went, this episode offers a powerful invitation to pay attention.
Not because something is wrong with you.
Because your body may be asking for something more.